The world can be a scary place for children. Wars, terrorist atrocities, natural disasters, bushfires, famine and shocking crimes are all regular features in the news we consume – not to mention the almost blanket coverage of the Covid-19 pandemic.
These events are traumatic to watch, even if they are happening on the other side of the world and thanks to technology, escaping them is not a matter of simply turning off the 6 o’clock news. This can leave many children anxious and fearful about the state of the world.
Registered Psychologist Charlotte Pugh from The Kids Research Institute Australia’s Embrace team, shares her advice for parents and carers of children who are distressed about things they see in the media.
How can I tell if my child is upset by something they have seen in the news?
Some children will tell their parents if they are upset by something they have seen, while others will express their distress through changes in behaviour. These may include: increased crying, becoming clingier, feeling unwell or sick in their stomach (having ‘butterflies’), changes in appetite, changes in sleep or experiencing nightmares, increased restlessness/activity, changes in emotions such as being more irritable or sad, or an increase in talking about death and dying. Other changes could be less noticeable – your child may become quieter, withdraw from family, friends or activities, or they might start regularly researching news events. If you notice changes in your child’s behaviour, it is important to check-in with them and have a conversation around how they are feeling.
Should I limit my child’s consumption of the news?
It is a good idea to keep a close eye on your child’s exposure to the news. Traumatic events can provoke anxiety in both parents and children and limits should be set depending on their age. This is particularly true for young children who may not understand what they are watching on the news. Monitoring how often your child is watching the news, what information they are hearing and whether they are reading news articles is important. Be mindful of whether the TV news is on in the background – children often absorb information without actively watching or listening. It is also important for adults and children to take a break from news coverage when a major event happens, such as a terrorist attack or bushfires. Avoiding the intense, wall-to-wall coverage that comes with these events will help your child feel less anxious. Discuss ground rules of exposure to the news with your child and let them know why you want to put limits in place. Encourage older children to take breaks from the news if they have access through a smart phone.
What should I say when my child asks me about a traumatic news event?
The best way to talk to your child about news events depends on their age and maturity. It is important to ask them how they are feeling and take time to acknowledge those feelings when you respond, for example: ‘I can hear you are really worried about what has been happening in the world’. It is important not to dismiss how your child is feeling or laugh off their worries. Provide reassurance by saying things like ‘I know what is happening can feel scary, but I am here to support and look after you’. Encourage your child to keep talking to you about their worries and concerns in the future. After having conversations about the news, it is a good idea to do an activity that is enjoyable together. This will help in managing anxiety, shifting attention away from distress and feeling more connected. You can also talk about what you might do as a family to feel more safe and secure, such as regular hygiene practices for Covid-19. This can help your child feel like they are more control.
How can I encourage them to focus on the positives when a traumatic news event happens?
Again, this depends on your child’s age and maturity. For younger children, explaining that doing positive activities and thinking about more positive things can help manage how worried they are feeling. This could be a joint activity, such as writing positive things about the world in a journal together each day and doing fun activities together. For older children, explaining that attempting to focus on the positives can be difficult but is important for their mental well-being. You could talk to older children about how the news presents selective information and how some images and stories are supposed to elicit emotions. It is important to be mindful of not to say things like ‘it could be worse’ in response to a traumatic event as that can minimise your child’s emotional reaction to the event. Time spent realistically appraising the event is also important. Highlighting the “helpers” – brave people who are doing their best to improve the situation like nurses, doctors and firefighters. This reassures your child that there are people doing something to help. It is also good to talk to your child about what type of things they can control, rather than focussing on things that are out of their hands. Maybe suggest writing letters of drawing pictures for first responders and hospital workers or donating together to a charity involved in helping victims. This can help provide a sense of control over the event.
How do I put these events into context?
It is important to be realistic with your child, while taking their age and maturity into consideration. Some events like war and certain natural disasters are unlikely to happen here in Western Australia, so you can point out the reasons why your child should not worry about those things happening here. It can be helpful to explain that events are happening in other parts of the world and show your child the locations on a map. It is also important to explain that the news often replays events (such as showing footage of a previous earthquake or terror attack when reporting on a more recent one) and there are not multiple things happening all at once. If your child is anxious about the Covid-19 pandemic because of what is happening in other countries, it could be useful to explain Australia’s relative success in controlling the outbreaks here. Reassuring your child by letting them know you are there for them is important.
How do my reactions to traumatic news vents shape my child’s response?
Your child will look to your reactions and behaviours to understand how concerned they should be about the events they see and hear in the news. Being mindful of your reactions and behaviours around your child will help them understand how they should respond. If you are aware you become stressed or upset while hearing or watching the news, it may be helpful to limit your exposure to times when you child is not around. Ensuring you keep your family routine consistent helps children feel like their world is secure.
If you are concerned about your child, you can check-in with a health professional or seek help from Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800 (Australia-wide) or Ngala on 08 9368 9368 (WA specific; metro and mobile callers) or 1800 111 546 (regional from a landline)